Short jokes
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to garden?
Lil Plant
Why was the math book sad at the rap battle?
Because it couldn't count the bars!
What did the rapper say to his shoes?
"You better lace up!"
Yo mama so fat that she was the float in the Thanksgiving Day Parade with Kermit the Frog!
If you think Tracy Latimer's murder was in any way justified, put on your helmet 'cause you're about to miss the short bus.
What’s something you can say at the funeral but also in bed?
"Damn, that's really stiff!"
I had a broken vacuum, then I put a One Direction sticker on it and it suddenly sucked again.
I feel bad for the people who were born on April 1.
Their life is a joke.
What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?
"Do you want the cameras on or off?"
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
"What do you want to eat?"
"You choose."
"Children."
"What?"
*Picks up pot*
"You said anything!"
Sorry to hear you feel like poo!
You like kissing boys, don't you?
"Babe, is it in?" "Yeah." "Does it hurt?" "Uh-huh." "Let me put it in slowly." "It still hurts." "Okay, let's try another shoe size."
Bill Clinton is no longer playing the saxophone.
He is now playing the whore-monica.
Why do women have two sets of lips?
I kiss both.
Why did the rapper become a beekeeper?
Because he wanted to make some HONEY FLOWS.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to fish?
MC Reel
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
In case of ill rhymes!
How do rappers keep their breath fresh?
With some FRESH BEATS.