Short jokes
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
To be wanted.
One day an orphan went to jail, and a big dude went behind him and said, "I want you." The orphan said, "Finally!"
Why can't an orphan play football? Because they can't find home or return it.
Why is an orphan into worshiping Satan?
'Cause they get to call someone "master" and be freaky.
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
Anthony Blinken's life sucks, and getting COVID-19 positive is the only positive thing that ever happened in his entire life!
What's another nickname for a flat emo?
A copping boars.
That's caketasic!
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
(insert funny joke about a dick here).
Did you laugh? Be honest.
What's the difference between a hundred decapitated babies and a Ferrari?
I don't have a Ferrari in my garage :|
What’s the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
How do astronauts have a party?
They planet.
People say towers can't move. Apparently, nobody told that to the Trade Centers.
Would love to pound Sterling with a 14 lb hammer.
What 16 stoner rode a Derby winner?
Lester Piggott's.
"Mmmmmmmm, daddy, f*ck me harder. I love you, daddy, mmmm. I luv your cock, mmmm, lick me, lick my clit, daddy!"
Eli is hot.
My arms are just a different texture pack compared to my body.