Short jokes
What is the true meaning of Christmas?
Stealing presents from orphans - a quote by Technoblade.
What thing can an orphan do best?
Stay at home alone.
Why can't orphans go big? When you go big, it's considered family size.
It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.
From now on, we’re gonna call shitting the bed an “Amber Alert.”
What is Meat Loaf's new name now that he has passed?
Ground beef.
What did the policeman shout to the cow running away?
"Get to the ground, beef!"
What animal howls at the moon and eats cement?
If you guessed wolf, you're right! I threw in the cement to make it hard.
The British Society of Psychics' annual convention had to be cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances!
Who jumps the highest?
The emos; some of them are still in the air.
I swear I witnessed your nana fall down the stairs.
L
I swear your eyebrows have attachment issues, they're touching right now.
What has only one sense of style?
An emo girl.
Isn't a gaming console something people use to not be alone?
THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE 50% OF THE GAMES OFFLINE?!??!?!
If you have a girlfriend/crush that's shorter than you, go up to her and say, "You're short, lemme add some inches."
Why’s BBC called BBC?
The dude’s shlong gets bigger every time he says n-
What do you call a black man in the dark?
- Nothing.
I thought the Sahara was the largest desert until I saw your forehead.
Why haven't they put Stephen Hawking in charge yet?
Q: What does LMAO mean?
A: Launching Missiles At Orphanages.