Sex jokes

Adam and Eve had sex. It was paradise.

My principal called my mom at school and said, "You should teach your son well." After coming back home, at first she taught me sex!

Why did the heterosexual woman try to put a mask 😷 on her pussy? She wanted to protect herself from covid, but she did try to put a mask 😷 on her dildo, but the mask 😷 keep falling off the dildo.

If her age is on the clock, she gets the cock.

Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.

REALLY CRAPPY JOKE ALERT!!! Oh Quin, how was eating that tight butt? Must be nasty. I heard you met from rear ending him.

What did the dick say to the condom?

Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏

A couple is on their first date.

Man: How do you feel about sex?

Woman: I like it infrequently.

Man: I see. Is that one word or two?

I was having sex with my girl, and she said she likes it rough, so I socked her in the face.

What's the best thing about a blowjob?

- The silence.

There was an illegal alien woman who wanted to be called "undocumented." So, I had "undocumented" sex with her and threatened to have her deported if she reported me for rape. I'd call it even.

Dr. Brody: Sir, your son has a disease called boofa.

Dad: What's boofa?

Dr. Brody: Both of these nuts in your mouth.

Q: How can you tell the sun is a boy?

A: It rises every morning.

What's the difference between a hooker and Jesus?

Their face when you nail them!

When you go to your friend's house to fuck her brother, but realize he's your brother from your mom's side.

If it's on the clock, it's old enough for the cock.

How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick?

When there is blood coming out of your dick instead of sperm.

What did the egg say to the boiling water?

It might take a while for me to get hard because I just got laid last night.

Life is like giving head... it always sucks.

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.

Unless you are in prison.