"Prostitutes love their jobs; they're always having a blast!"
Sex Jokes
What’s the similarity between my dick and my girlfriend?
I beat both of them.
I'd make a masturbation joke.
But they always get out of hand.
The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"
Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.
...
I guess her rubber broke too.
2 weeks here.
What do dicks and popsicles have in common?
They both like to be sucked on, and they sometimes choke you.
I heard you were looking for a stud. I have the STD, and all I need is U.
Why do physically challenged gay men suck dick better than females who are able-bodied and heterosexual?
Because physically challenged gay men do it best! 👏 🙌 👍👍 👌 👌 💪 💪 🥰 😊 😃 😄 😁 😍 💖 ❤️ 💖 ❣️ 💕 💘
*funny joke about dicks*
Having sex while camping is fucking in tents (intense).
What’s the difference between women and condoms?
There isn’t a difference; they’re both throw aways.
Sam and Amya like anal sex with each other.
Fancy playing rodeo sex?
"OK then," she said!
Then put your dick in her ass and say it’s not as tight as your sister’s ass and hold on for dear life... real life cow bow boy shit!
What do ya call a legless prostitute in a strawberry field?
A jammy cunt.
So, no head?
My mom came to me and shouted, "Nobody is giving me a fuck." So I went forward and fucked her!
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.
What does a Chinese man say to his partner when having sex?
"Ching Chong Soc Mai Ding Dong"
Child: "Mom, what's an 'orgasm'?"
Mom: "I don't know, dear. Try asking your father."
While fucking a hot auntie, pressing tightly her boobs and fondling, He: What do you feed your babies? She: Milk and orange juice. He: Wow, which side is orange juice? 😋
My mother caught me jerking off and she told me to leave it out. I didn't know what she was doing but she grabbed my cock and started sucking. Then I found out on porn she was doing deep throat.
A couple of weeks later my dad caught me jerking off, I thought he would deep throat, but he just walked up to me and slapped my boner. I cried for 5 hours. Luckily my mum gave me a sloppy joe afterwards.
