I don’t have another talking stage in me. 🤦🏿♂️ Do you squirt, and is your BD dead? 😭
Sex Jokes
Tyler only has a kid because they don't make condoms the size of Lego Men.
Barney-1 2 3 what number comes next?
Barney-that’s right it’s penis!
Konan was having sex on the couch, thinking how he'd come so far.
What's a prostitute's favorite snack?
Skittles. They love to taste the rainbow.
Suck my pp!
In Antarctica, there are ice dicks for ladies to hop onto.
Little do they know I've been waiting for this moment.
Heh heh, get it? 69! Ha ahahaha!
A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?"
The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again."
An old woman walked into a dentist's office, took off all her clothes, and spread her legs. The dentist said, "I think you have the wrong room."
"You put in my husband's teeth last week," she replied. "Now you have to remove them."
A penguin takes his car to the shop, and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn't the cleanest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one look at him and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
"No," the penguin insists, "it's just ice cream."
If your Uncle Jack was on his roof, and he wanted you to help him down, would you help your Uncle Jack off?
A family's driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect."
"Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"
My penis.
I wrote a few jokes:
What does a 15-year-old boy do without two hands when his parents are not at home? Well, obviously do not jerk off.
Yesterday a girl from my job invited me to her home and there I had crazy sex. I could not think that her mother is so hot.
What will happen the morning after the destruction of humanity? Duncan MacLeod makes himself breakfast.
Why did the guy take a bath? Because he came, and it was too much of a mess.
What's the difference between kinky and perverted? Kinky is when you tickle your girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when you use the whole bird.
Did you know that big black dicks can be weapons and can kill people?
Floyd Mayweather proved it when he gave it to Logan Paul in the ass.
I was listening to WAP in my car with my four-year-old cousin, and she asked why they don't fix the holes in the house.
Then my fucking boyfriend, what a hoe, was.
I have a penis, and sometimes I bite it.
A prostitute walks in the bar, and she goes up to the bartender and says, "I just made $100 and 5¢ sucking dick." The bartender says, "Who gave you the 5¢?" The prostitute says, "They all did!"
"Dick me down shorts."
Yahahlmsyw.
That stand for:
You are has a whole, let me show you why.
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.
