Sex jokes
Addicted, what did the drug dealer say to the dopewhore?
"Damn whore, you're not that addicted when you spread your legs open for any man. No wonder weed is more addicted than yo ass." Lol
"Balls in Jack, Jack has balls in his mouth."
Penis.
Hey, you down to fuck?
No, I’m just down.
How can you tell if your sister is on her period?
Your father's dick tastes funny.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to do it in the water. Jack slipped, his condom ripped, and now they have a daughter.
There was this guy who asked a girl how much her hand jobs are. "$25k." How much are your blowjobs? "$50k." How much do you charge to have sex on the street? REPLY: "I would if I had a pussy."
Clit
What does a necrophiliac get at a wedding?
Mourning wood.
You know why women wear tampons?
So the crabs could bungee jump!
what's another name for cumming inside of a woman?
loading the dishwasher.
What do you call a whore with a runny nose?
...Full!
*having sex on lexapro*
Her: Cum for me, baby!
Me: I'm trying!
Why did the orphan want to become a prostitute?
To get a daddy.
I eat dick.
"Dick me down shorts."
What’s the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic corn shucker “shucks between fits”...
Lost my virginity to a down syndrome the other day... only cause I wanted my first time to be special.
When they walk in and you're fucking... everyone at the morgue.
I think I banged a Chinese celebrity...
She kept screaming “I’m Wei Tu Yung” like I was supposed to know the name.