Sex jokes
I was accused of rape, but I swear she was a whore.
What do you call it when two transgender midgets have sex?
And microtransaction.
Carly: Hey do [you] want to have sex? [Age] (43)
Zina: No! [Age] (10)
Carly: Good cause I can make you do it anyway! [Age] (43)
What do you spot in this place that [is] gay!
Police Report: Looking for a female, light brown hair, blue eyes, freckles, and a small scar on her right check.
Last seen on CCTV wearing see-through bottoms, a pink top, and a vibrating dildo hanging out of her arse. If you find this woman, please get her to charge the dildo for excessive fun.
I love necrophilia, but only if it's consensual!
Did you hear about the guy who died of a Viagra overdose?
They couldn’t close his casket.
What's the useless skin around the vagina? A woman.
What do you call a guy who loves to eat out a hoe's pussy?
Answer: a Carnivwhore.
What's the difference between sleeping pills and my beating my meat?
Sleeping pills actually come with a prescription.
I’m horny who else is *ugh ugh papi harder*.
Why can’t a tree have sex? They are always tied up.
So I saw a bag full of children near a dumpster. I guess we know where the orphans are when the parents didn’t want them.
Wouldn’t want to hope a Catholic priest comes along, otherwise the priest will have new sex toys.
What is the best part about Alabama prostitutes?
Family comes first.
"Penis equals power, pussy equals wussy."
Why do Catholic priests suck on the cock of a young boy in his parish?
Because it tastes like a Vienna sausage.
Why do people have sex? Because they're dumb.
Women should be seen and not heard.
But how would you control that if she was screaming "NO!!!" in the bedroom?
What is the difference between a man performing anilingus on a woman and a man performing cunnilingus on a woman?
If a man is performing anilingus on a woman, it is not classified as heterosexual sodomy, you fucking idiot!!!!!
Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.
What kind of ball does Amy Rose like? Blue balls.