September

September jokes

Pilot

POV: You are a passenger on September 11th, 2001, and you see the pilots wearing a Muslim turban.

Tower

Why is America not good at Clash Royale? Answer: They lost 2 towers! 🤣🤣🤣🤣

9/11

I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."

Birthday

What is the worst thing about your birthday being on September 11?

Party crashers.

Memes

Child

Q: A mom had 5 children: January, February, March, April. What is the name of the fifth child?

A: What.

Similarity

What's the similarities between the New York Jets and the World Trade Center?

They both fall in September.

Santa Claus

Cancer

It is September. What's the difference between a stage four colon cancer patient and Santa Claus? Santa is coming for Christmas!

Birthday

My birthday's on September 11th, I'm gonna turn the fuck up and throw a banger! Then rub my tits in birthday cake frosting!!! WOOOOOOOOO!

Cake

For my birthday on Sept. 11 this year, I just want a plane chocolate cake.

Plane Crash

You can give a hockey team airplane a new source of heating, but it went too far on September 7th, 2011, when the Yaroslavl plane crash happened.

Team

"Chelsea is the most consistent team.

One win in August, one win in September, and one win in October; it's just like a menstrual cycle.

If they don't win in November, just know that they're pregnant." 😅

Toe

My grandma stubbed her toe in an elevator on September 21st.

Work

It was September 10, 2001, when I stayed up watching TV shows.

I woke up late for work at The World Trade Center, but it was burning. I said out loud, "I was late! I'm happy I was late to work! I mean... I could've di-" I was then beaten and bruised by the emergency services.

Pilot

My grandpa was a great pilot, but he died on September 11, 2001.

Labor Day

Me: September is here!

[Labor Day comes]

Also me (ft. Green Day): “Wake me up when September ends!”

People

People often ask me what I would do for a Klondike bar. Well, I'd straight up put 5 hijackers on Flight 175 before it departed from Logan Airport at 8:14 a.m. on September 11, 2001.