School jokes

Your hairline so bad that when your teacher puts you to sit in the front of the class, your hairline be all the way in the back.

What do you call a teacher who never farts in public? A private tutor.

What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!

When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.

Yo hairline so ugly, when you go to school you fall on a line.

I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.

Not to brag, but I defeated our local chess champion in less than five moves.

Finally my high school karate lessons came to some use.

We were watching a 9/11 documentary in class.

I started playing the Angry Birds theme song. That didn't fly well with people, the teacher yelled at me like a bomb, and I landed on the ground.

The orphan can’t play soccer because he doesn’t know where home is, and his school is too dumb to learn.

Your forehead is so big that the teachers used it as a whiteboard.

Pro lifers: End abortion!!!

Pro lifers after school shooting: But not this abortion.

Why did the sped kid get expelled?

Because he was tardy.

My teacher made us watch a movie about the struggles of being an overweight person in this day and age.

It was really heavy on me.

What do you say when Jack's late to sex ed?

"Aye-jack-you-late!"

My mum is a vegan. She brings us to after school seitan.

Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.

You was reaching into you’re backpack and the whole class jumped through the window.

I see my friends at school. They talk to me, they go back to class, but they forgot I am their classmate, and they were like, "You're a dumbie." And I was, "Well, you're a dumbass, bi***!"

I went to a gun shop yesterday. Everything was half off. I didn't know that back to school sales have begun.

Blame Austria for creating Hitler, who we know today. He failed art school.