School

School jokes

Orphan

Teacher: Anyone missing?

Orphan: My parents.

Teacher: Something that is real, kid.

Orphan: My family.

Teacher: OMG, out of my classroom, kid!

Emo

At school I am always called emo.

Little did they know that emos are wannabe goths.

Book

Q: Why did the math book look so sad?

A: Because of all its problems.

Shooter

I think it was wrong for that school shooter to end his life at the scene.

He could have done some good by becoming some lonely lifer's bottom.

Battle

Fortnite battle pass, I just shit out my ass. The school: You did what?

Memes

Orphan

I got sent to the principal's office for giving an orphan kid a family-size pack.

Pencil

Why can't you run with a pencil in the hallway? Because too many people got killed!

Nut

Me: What are we doing in HPE?

Friend: Fitness.

Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.

Number

During school today, a girl gave my friend her number. When I saw it, it was the principal's number.

Kid

Teacher: Here, have candy.

Kid: No, I’m too fat.

Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.

*Next week*

Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.

Kid: I’m too fat to get up.

Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?

Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.

Sister

"My sister said she was the only smart one in the class."

"What about the teacher you learn *from*?"

Alphabet

He entered (kindergarten) class. The teacher said, "Luce, start for us and say the alphabet." He said, "A B C D E F G H I J K *just kidding* L M N O." Laugh my nose off. The teacher said, "Go to the office right now, young man!" I don't understand, he just said jokes to the teacher, lmao :D

Crash

What does a school bus crash and a train crash have in common?

They always line up.

Remote

Why did the school go remote?

Because the teachers wanted to play with remotes!

Asthma

Tired kid with asthma: "It's hard to breathe."

Gym Teacher: "That's alright."

Other Kid: "Hush!"