School

School jokes

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Son - Dad, I've been expelled from school for having sex with a girl in my class.

Dad - Son, that's the 2nd school this year! Maybe teaching isn't for you!

My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...

I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.

  • 3

    • Teacher: What’s 2+2?

    Jimmy: 2+2=feEesh

    Teacher: Well, Jimmy I can see you're going places, not college, but places.

    Commander: "Fire a warning shot."

    Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher."

    Commander: "Potato, potato, just fire."

    Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school*

    Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"

  • 1

    • The son margarine shows his father his test that he failed.

    Father: Son, you can do butter!

    I was sitting in math class, and our teacher doesn't like it if we don't work on math in his class. So, I did science homework on top of a math book.

    This isn't a joke, just an American back-to-school list.

    1. Pencils

    2. Binders

    3. Paper

    4. Pencil sharpener.

    What, did you think I was going to make a school shooter joke?

    Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.

    There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.

    One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:

    Police: "What’s you name?"

    Shut Up: "Shut Up."

    Police: "Where's your manners?!"

    Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."

    What's the difference between a Black person and a white person?

    Black people don't shoot up schools.

  • 6

    • So, there were kids in the bus, and half of them were white, and the other half was black.

    All the kids wanted to sit at the back, so the bus driver said to all the kids, "Stop fighting. From now on, everyone is now green." So, the bus driver said to all the kids, "Dark green go to the front, and light green at the back."