Say Jokes

What did the cow say when he lost his tractor?

"Where's my tractor?"

Why can’t someone say "ur mums gay" to an orphan? Because he doesn’t have a mum.

I went shopping, and then to the hospital, and then to bed, and then I promised to only say "and" once in a sentence.

What did the cat say when he was stuck on a thorn-bush?

"Meow!"

What did the marshmallow say when he was roasting in the fire? "Is it hot in here, or is it just me?"

This is Sally.

Sally says hi.

This is Sally when a car comes by. 🤕

If it is someone's birthday, say this for a joke:

"A long time ago in a far away galaxy...

YOU WERE BORN!"

Me: Hi Jaiden.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: Leave me alone, weirdo.

Me: Wow, says the one who didn't pass 3rd grade.

Bully/Jaiden Harper: *hits*

Me: *calls FBI and puts on gloves and stabs random person then gives knife to Jaiden and takes off gloves* Bye bye.

FBI: FBI OPEN UP!!!!!!!!!

What did the porg say to the porg?

Hi Porg.

You're on worst jokes ever. You thought I put up a good joke? HAHAHAH!

Did you know that whenever I read my blood donor ID?

Because it says "B Positive!"

What did Santa say to the rain? Go away!

To whoever @heil dem anfuhrer is, I hope you know I can’t understand what you’re saying. So next time you get on an American website, please speak English, and I don’t speak whatever European language that is.😊

When your friend gets involved with someone, it affects the friendship. Whenever a friend of mine has a new girlfriend, we should say I looked like the person you used to know, but I've been modified to survive in this relationship. If we have an argument and she's there, I might disagree with you; I'd rather continue to see her naked.

"1v1," said Kobe. LeBron James says, "Ok, bet," and bet the money. Bro, ok, let's get it."

At night in the Nunnery, one Nun says to the other Nun, "Where's the candle?" The other Nun says, "Doesn't it!"

The 11th of September is considered 9/11 in America. The Twin Towers fell on 9/11 in 2001, but to call an emergency in America, you dial 911! 😮 You could say they dialed that correctly.

How do you give a woman from Alabama a nice compliment?

Answer: You say to her, "Hey, nice tooth!"

So if you say a bear shoots children, and Leah likes Mason Boswells, and I go to Benjamin Adlard year 6.

Go to the replies, look at the top and it will say "in your mum."

What does a volcano say when it has a runny nose?

"I have runny volcanoes."