Say jokes
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Nothing, it just waved!
A guy in a Costco was pretty pissed off at something. A guy walks up to him and says, "What's wrong, pal? Don't worry, it's not like you're on an abandoned aisle!"
Children are so ungrateful nowadays. I got my daughter a bike, but now she’s crying on the floor saying, “I don’t have legs!”
What did the corn say to the flying apple?
"That's corny."
A lady comes into the boys' bathroom and a boy sees her.
"This is not a girls' bathroom," he says.
She answers, "I don’t care," she says, "I NEED TO PEE!"
How to say “I love you” be like :
What did the cookie say when he jumped off the cliff? Crumbs, ha ha!
What did the one ocean say to the other? Nothing, it just waved.
Yo mama so fat, she stand on the scale and the scale says: "I want your weight, not your phone number!"
He was a head of his class... Mom always says, "Stay ahead!"
A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, “Are there any girls here?”
The bartender says, “No, only women.”
The man then leaves.
What did the rapper say at the bakery?
"I need ALL the dough you got!"
Would you steal 20 dollars from a stupid 6 year old kid with Down syndrome who can't talk and make ah ah ah noises, or get one dollar for saying the N word?
Say what you want about Jeffrey Epstein, but at least he knew how to take out the trash.
What did the egg say to the tuna?
What did the earthquake say when it was done? Sorry, my fault!
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?"
Say what you will about pedophiles. At least they drive slowly through school zones.
We say “Father, I have sinned,” because it would be weird if we said, “Daddy, I have sinned,” right?
“Forgive me, Daddy, for my transgressions!” We say the “Our Father,” not the “Our Daddy.”
It took me years to figure out the Oreos served in Lunchables are knock offs. On the cover it says “Chocolate Crème Cookies.” I’ve believed this lie for as long as I can remember. Unless they were real back then? I don’t even know at this point. They sure as hell aren’t real now!
"What did the zero say to the eight?"
"That belt looks good on you!"