Say jokes
Three guys are standing in an alley on an alien planet, and the psycho one says, "However many tits your girl has is how many balls you have!"
The first guy says, "Ha! My girlfriend has six! I'm racked up!" The second guy said, "Eh, I am happy with two balls." The third guy said, "Shit! My girlfriend is flat as fuck!"
A guy listening in enters and says, "Bro, you actually have girlfriends. I do not. Does that mean I have a pussy?"
You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.
Your hairline is back, people say. "Look at this dude."
Guy goes to the doctor. The doctor says, "You look run down." The guy says, "No, I've come on my bike!"
What did the lion say to the lion tamer? Nothing, because when the lion tamer whipped the lion, the lion killed him.
What did the rapist say to his victim?
"Go ahead, call the police. We will see who comes first."
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
It's not rape if she doesn't say no.
Two options: - Chloroform. - Duct Tape.
"Watch out, there's an iceberg!"
Other person: "We will be fine."
10 minutes later, drowns, says, "We will be fine."
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
What did the grape say when the fox stepped on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Dogs say woof.
Cows say moo.
Idiots say, "The site will be less dead when school starts again!"
What did the angry cow say to its enemy?
"We have beef!"
How to harass? Say it out loud but slowly. Split that word into, and it sounds like "her ass."
You're so ugly, you made Hello Kitty say bye!
What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
The teacher says, "Spit out your gum," but a train says, "Chew chew!"
What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?
"Dance to the beet, y'all!"
What is the difference between a nun and a prostitute?
One says, "God is my father." The other says, "Who's the father and who is my son?"
What do you say to your sister when she's crying? -- "Are you having a crisis?"
What did the police say on the TV during 9/11?
"Call 911!"