Say jokes
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
What did one emo kid say to the other? "Nice guts, G!"
The best joke: you. O wait, I can't even say that because jokes have meaning.
What did the hurricane say to the coconut tree?
Hold on to your nuts; this ain’t no ordinary blow job.
What did Jake say to Peggy?
"CALC-U-LATOR!" Get it? Like, "Catch you later!"
What did the British soldiers say while in the trenches? "Damn, it's windy out here!"
Your hairline's so bad, your dad went to get the milk and never came back. Years later, he comes back and says, "Go get a hairline, boy."
Your hairline is back, people say. "Look at this dude."
What did the star say? It's Star Trek.
Two lepers meet on the street.
First says "How are you doing?"
Second says "Mustn't crumble!"
What are they going to say about Tim Gunn in 20 years?
He kicked the bucket.
What do you call someone who’s blond, beautiful, and listens to what you’re saying, but only hears what they want?
Womxn
What did Vegeta say to Bulma?
What?
Can I show you my new move? It's called BIG BANG ATTACKKKK! :)
When you tell her you are about to "COME," she says no, don't, please just keep going.
Shenron: THAT IS BEYOND MY POWER.
My crush's best friend came up to me and called me my crush's dog 🐕, so then I say, "Wow, you're an ass for calling me a bitch." He then looks at me wide-eyed, and I just walk away.
What can you say about that homeless man's life and current status?
Wasted.
What can you say about planes that you can say about stocks?
They both be flying??
Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?
Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.
Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.
Two muffins are in an oven.
One says, "Man, it is hot in here!"
The other one says, "OMG, a talking muffin!"
So there is someone who doesn't know what an armadillo is.
He then sees one. He asks it a question, "What are you?"
The armadillo replies, "Armadillo."
The person says: "What's a dilo?"