Say jokes

Your girlfriend/boyfriend says: "I'm dating your uncle..." You start crying and you look under the bed and your uncle says: "Damn."

Tork Poettschke says to Charles Bukowski: "You have beautiful teeth! Are they also available in white?"

Louis Armstrong and Tork Poettschke go for a walk.

One says to the other, "My wife always says that icke is no worse than the other men."

"How many men does your wife have?"

How do you stun a Scotsman?

Ask them to say "purple burglar alarm".

What did the Indian say when the pizza was delivered to him?

"Hey! Who puked on the frybread?"

What’s something you can say about a fat person, but not about strippers?

Those legs sure hold a lot of weight.

Bertold Brecht & Tork Poettschke visit the places of their youth together. One says to the other: "Here used to be the Phoenix Lake. Where did he go?" "That was probably a pirate ..."

Something you can say about your furniture, but not your partner: "Those legs sure hold a lot of weight."

Yo Mama is so dumb, she stares at a juice carton for an eternity because it says "Concentrate" on the box.

What's one way to drain someone's ego?

Hand them a mirror, and say they should see how ugly they turned out in life.

When a woman says, "I need to be treated like a delicate flower," don't cut the wrong cord on the bomb.

What did one sperm say to the other while swimming side by side?

One turns to the other and asks, "How much further to the fallopian tubes?"

The other says, "I’m not sure, we just passed the esophagus."

President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."

That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.

What did the dark man say when he found out he had an erectile dysfunction?

"I can't breed! I can't breed! I can't breed!"

R.I.P. Floyd.

What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?

"If we don't get some support soon, people will start to think we are balls."

What do you say to someone being cremated? You urned it!

An orphan boy at my school did really badly on a test and started crying. I said, “Don’t worry, your parents won’t say anything.”

What did the llama say when the villagers said that he had to leave the village?

"Alpaca my bags."

The tables in my class are straight, but I can’t say the same thing for your hairline.

An orphan comes up to me and says, "You're ugly." I said, "You remind me of Spider-Man: No Way Home."