What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
What do you say to a 1 legged hitch hiker?
Hop in!
Little Sally comes home from school one day and says to her mom, "Mommy, mommy, you won’t believe it! Little Johnny just pulled out his PP in class." The mother responded, "Well, what did it look like?" Sally said, "It looks like a peanut." The mother said, "Oh, it was small." "No, it was salty," said Sally.
I asked a person in a wheelchair if they wanted to fight. All I had to do is say, "Stand up!"
When the North Tower saw the South Tower collapse, he would say, "I'm still standing."
A horse walks into a bar.
The barman says...
"Why the long face?"
What did the dirt say to the embers?
You look smoking hot.
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
What did the right eye say to the left eye?
"Between you and me, something smells!"