Say jokes
What did The Rock say to his dad?
"I'm gonna Rock Bottom my cock down your throat!"
Say "crack my finger" backwards.
Imagine someone leaving a cut-out of Jeff Bezos on your car after you found out your blind bf cheated on you, and the McDonald's employee says over the speaker, "Weren't expecting him to see other hoes were you?"
My bumper sticker says: "👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD."
What does a construction worker say to another construction worker?
Screw you!
Memes
My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.
What does the cross guard say to the cows crossing the road?
Mooooooooooo along!
What did the grape say when the Meerkat stepped on it?
It said nothing, just let out a little wine.
What did the kids say hi to? A slide.
A boy asks a zookeeper, "Why is there a baguette in a cage?"
The zookeeper says, "It's bread in captivity!"
What did the shoe say to the other shoe?
Nothing, it was tied up in another conversation.
What did the kangaroo say to the elephant? Hi up there!
They say I’m sliced like the apples in a kids meal.
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
What does a Chinese guy say to his lover? “You’re the ying to my yang!”
What did the blind kid say after touching the emo kid’s hand?
“I ain’t reading all that.”
People say that Pakistan is a terrorist nation...
Guys, it's not true, even Osama bin Laden lived there peacefully for 6 years.
What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.
How do you make a dishwasher work again?
Smack her ass and say "get back to work!"
Ukrainians leave without saying goodbye.
Russians say goodbye without leaving.