Say jokes

My bumper sticker says: "👋FORMER BABY ON BOARD."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

What is the most noise that comes out of a ladies mouth? Nothing because they never have anything important to say.

Some people said that JFK had big parties. Some even would say they were *mind blowing*.

What did John Cena say to the blind kid? "You can't see me."

What did the science textbook say to the math textbook?

You've got a lot of problems!

Q: What did one gay cowboy say to the other gay cowboy?

A: Hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

What did the headless horseman say to the woman?

"Give me head."

When I was at work, I saw this kid crying. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working in an orphanage.

When somebody says they're depressed (by over-romanticizing their so-called problems) but can't be by your side when you are at your lowest.

Then you know they're faking depression. 🙂

If you know it, you know it.

What does an electric-type Pokémon say when they get gassy while drinking milk?

I’m Zaptos intolerant!

What did the helicopter say to the mountain?

Kobe.

Mom asks, "Why are you are THIS show??? It's DISTRACTING you from SCHOOL!!!!!"

The child says, "Don't you mean SCHOOL is distracting ME from this AWESOME show?"

Mom whispers, "Oh, you DEAD."

What did the Taliban say to the Afghan?

Nothing, they blew him up.

What did Joe Biden say when he got pulled over?

I'm just a-Biden the law, officer.

Jeffrey Dahmer and his mother are having dinner.

His mother says, “I don’t like your friends.”

Then Jeff says, “You can eat the potatoes.”

I asked my friend how long I can be in the sky. He said if you are emo, then forever.

Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.

A man comes home, and the wife says, "My ex just died by getting hit by a bus." And the husband said, "I lost my job as a bus driver."

What did the tower say to its twin? "Hey, is that a plane?"