Said jokes

She asked me if I was hung like a horse, but I said no.

I'm hung like a person who wants to die, but then the rope broke.

Your mama is so fat that when she went to the scale, it said, "No elephants allowed!"

My boss said “dress for the job you want, not for the job you have.” So I went in as Batman.

My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?

Yo mama so fat, she stepped on the scale and it said a.k.a. "error."

One day I was at church. I had to sit down. I said, "Who in the world stinks?" I looked down. Turns out it was me, and this is not a joke, but funny.

Stephen Hawking said there is no God.

2018 God said there is no Stephen Hawking.

Sauron said, "Eye see all."

In 2011, Stephen Hawking said God didn’t exist.

In 2018, God said Stephen Hawking didn’t exist. xx 😂😂

Last night I slipped on a banana.

My friend said it was a-peeling!

I searched up hornets and then said that it will leave a sting.

A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."

The other sibling said, "You are, too."

Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."

And the sibling says, "We're twins."

The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."

My mom said that I don't listen to homophones, but then I said, "No, I listen to headphones."

As the car crashed, someone said, "I see a light!"

A Roman went to the bar and he held up two fingers and said, "Can I have five drinks, please?"

Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”

Once at school, a teacher thought I was Russian. Why do you think that? I said. The teacher replied, because you're reading from Right to Left.

Your hairline goes even further back than the last time your parents said "I love you."

Stephen Hawking said he wants other physicists to follow in his footsteps.

I could tell my cousin you are so annoying, but she told me first, so we both said it at the same time. 🫣🤣😂