Roast jokes

Mom asks, "Who are you talking to?"

The child said, "A mistake."

When you step on the scales, it says "to be confined."

Treat me like a joke, and I will leave you like it's funny.

Yo mama's so fat, she stepped on a scale and it said: "To be continued."

My hair strainer is hotter than you.

Bro, whenever I look at you, Fortnite gets popular again.

You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.

When I was born, I saw you at the adoption center alone.

That day your dad got milk. 😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬😬

I'd mop the floor with your face, but you might just mess it up more.

Yo mama's so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.

Your mouth looks like it came from the commercials.

Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.

You: Well... your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you can't even do that.

And your IQ is 5.

You think people with glasses are smart, but they fail the eye doctor test.

To All The Naruto Fans:

Sharingan is red, Rasengans are blue, If you dare touch my daughter, I'll Chidori you!

I was gonna roast you about your chin, but I didn't know which one to talk about.

Roses are red, violets are blue, God made me pretty, what happened to you?

You just might be why the middle finger was invented in the first place.

Why is America better than Japan at rapping?

Because we're better at dropping bombs.

I know your name is baller cause I'm gonna put my baller into yo MOTHER HOLLER!

Imagine being such a low life that you need people to roast you to have stuff to do.