Roast jokes

You are so fat you tried to eat the word "edible."

What do you call 1 normal kid and 2 retarded kids smoking weed?

Pot roast.

You're so fat, when people see you running, they can't help but yell out, "Keep running!"

Your mum went to the dentist so she could install Bluetooth.

Girl: "...I like you... do you like me back?"

Me: "Nope."

Girl: *is depressed* "Oh okay...."

Me: "You never said \"love\"".

Girl: "Oh! well do you love me?"

Me: "Frick no."

I thought of you today. It reminded me to take out the trash.

Your nose is so big that Apple had to make a custom iPhone that unlocks using Nose ID.

you look like a dumb crab. When everyone sees you, the world will end.

What’s the difference between your sister and a bowling ball?

I can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!

I thought God didn't make mistakes, but then I saw your face.

You have gaps in your teeth, looks like your tongue is in jail.

Joe mama so dumb she studies for the COVID test.

I would roast you, but I'm not supposed to burn trash.

The bushes outside got jealous after they saw your eyebrows.

Your eyebrows are far from home just like your dad.

I’d roast you, but your mirror does that for me every day.

Friend, you so faaaat.

Me: Boy, at least I'm not built like a Nintendo Switch.

Roses are red, violets are blue, it's really no wonder your mama left you!

I was sad, so I called the depression hotline. Turns out the depression hotline is where people roast you until you are depressed.

This anorexic girl wanted to fight me. I told her that I would roast her, but she didn't have any meat.