Road jokes
Why did the Russian cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Why did the pillow cross the road?
Because his cousin's name was Koshin, and he didn't want to live anymore.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
Two tomatoes are walking on a road. Then a car runs over one of them, and the other says: "Hi, ketchup!"
Memes
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
Why did the Mafia cross the road?
Forget about it...
I saw a cyclist in the road today, so I ran over him and he said in a robotic voice, "SHUTTING DOWN!"
Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit the idiot.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
The chicken who?
*Silence*
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To get to the other side of the TRACK.
What did the rapper say to the traffic jam?
"Move over, I'm about to drop some FIRE!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answer:
The man said, "He's going to rape the people on the side of the road."
Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?
Why did my brother cross the road?
Because he was looking for his brain.
Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the British bastard and get the egg roll.
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he wanted to.
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.
What bounces up and down at 100 miles per hour?
A baby tied to the back of a pick up truck.