Road jokes
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get the Chinese Daily!
Get it? I don't either--I get the New York Times!
My blind son got hit by a car when he was riding his new bike. He should have been paying attention.
Two tomatoes are walking on a road. Then a car runs over one of them, and the other says: "Hi, ketchup!"
Why did the frog cross the road to hop to his side, Bih?
Why did my brother cross the road?
Because he was looking for his brain.
Memes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Answer:
The man said, "He's going to rape the people on the side of the road."
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the British bastard and get the egg roll.
Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.
Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit the idiot.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
The chicken who?
*Silence*
Why did the Mafia cross the road?
Forget about it...
I saw a cyclist in the road today, so I ran over him and he said in a robotic voice, "SHUTTING DOWN!"
What did the rapper say to the traffic jam?
"Move over, I'm about to drop some FIRE!"
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To get to the other side of the TRACK.
Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he wanted to.
They said I couldn't drive.
Now they know I can't cause they are all dead.
Driving on a road at night and hit a speed bump. Remember, there are no speed bumps... I hit Bambi!
What bounces up and down at 100 miles per hour?
A baby tied to the back of a pick up truck.
Q: Why did the baby cross the road? A: It was stapled to the chicken.
Q: Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.
Q: Why did the baby fall out of the tree? A: Because it was stapled to the koala.
Q: Why did the tree fall over? A: The koala never let go.
Q: Why did the kangaroo die? A: Because the koala landed on it.
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
It didn't; it got stuck in a crack.