Road jokes
Why did the pillow cross the road?
To get to a mattress store!
Why did the fat rape victim cross the road?
To block traffic.
Why did Mimi cross the road?
She had cancer.
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldn’t think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, “What is your one wish, my son?” He said, “I wish you can make them all ugly again.”
Why did the orphan cross the road?
Because his parents couldn’t help him out!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
What is big and fun and yellow? A school bus!
You know that feeling when you're going through a school parking lot and go over a speed bump, then you realize that there are no speed bumps?
Why did the emu cross the road? Because it was the chicken's day off. Yeah, I hate myself, man.
What happened to the police that crossed the road?
They solved a murder involving the nut case.
Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Why couldn't the pervert cross the road? Because his dick was in the chicken's ass!
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
It didn't have the guts to do it.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to his job at KFC!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: It just felt like it.
Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from Kernel Sanders.
Hehehe
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To die on the other side.
What do you call an idiot who walks on the road when cars are coming?
Fresh roadkill.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
Who knows and who cares?
Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack.
Toilet paper cried across the road.