Road jokes
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
The potholes so big in Oklahoma Can make a whole garden.
This ole boy picked up this hooker and was getting some head driving down the road, and she started gagging on it a little, and he said, "Oh yeah baby, you like that big dick, don't ya?" and she said, "Oh baby, it's not that, ya asshole stinks!"
Why did the cow cross the road?
To get to the Moo-vie theater.
What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?
Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?
Why did the chicken cross the road why? Because they wanted to kick someone in the family.
Don’t you hate it when you are driving in a school zone and the speed bump starts screaming?
A turtle is crossing the road when he’s mugged by two snails. When the police show up, they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies, “I don’t know. It all happened so fast.”
"Dog the dog" and Maggie were frightened of her, and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor. Jokes and Maggie were walking. I was going to go off the road to the city hall to see her, and I said that the only one-piece dress for women readymade RB collection, as he was walking in the city, and Maggie was a little bit more on the side of it.
Why did Ama cross the road?
To find his dad.
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.
The blonde cop asked to see the blonde driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated.
'What does it look like?' she finally asked. The policewoman replied, 'It's square and it has you picture on it.'
The driver finally found a square mirror in her purse, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. 'Here it is,' she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "OK, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop..."
I saw an orphan on the road. I asked him if he's an orphan. The kid says, "Yeah, what gave it away?"
I say, "Your parents."
Why did Little Johnny drop his ice cream?
Because he got hit by a bus.
Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."
Why did the bus cross the road?
Why did the retard cross the road?
He never made it!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To try to get away from the man.
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his d**k was stuck in the chicken.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
So he can be hit by a car and be reunited with his parents.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the other TIDE!!! 🤣🐙🐙
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To check in on his flat mate.