Road jokes
Why would the chicken not cross the road?
Because it's too old. (The joke is old.) (The chicken is old.)
Why did the dog cross the road twice?
Because he was trying to catch a boomerang.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To find their way to the store to see their dad.
Why did the kid cross the road?
Because he wasn't wearing his seat belt! 😂
Why did the chicken cross the road?...
To get to the other side.
Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to finish his essay, or the teacher was gonna whoop his fat butt cheeks!
What do you call it if you find an old organ keyboard on the side of the road?
Organ harvesting.
Why did the emo step in front of a car? To get to the other side.
Why does new pavement smell like butt?
In other words you can also call it asphalt.
Ass-phalt.
Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."
1, 2, 3, 4, 5. I'm old enough to drive, for now I'm still alive, till I crash in that beehive!
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
Because he was part of the Lazy Bones team!
What does a car have when it's very itchy?
A road rash.
Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
He got hit!
What did the stop sign say to the street sign when he couldn't read a map?
"Can you give me some pointers?"
While I was walking on the road, a cat crossed my road, and 5 min later I found it fell in the gutter.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?
'Cause she didn't wear a seatbelt.
Why did the suicidal person cross the road?
To slow down traffic!
Yesterday, I tried to help a little girl by a road stop crying. I asked her where her parents were, and that made her cry harder. So then I asked her where her house was, and she said with tears, "I don't have one." So I got her in my car and drove her to where she said she was living. It was an orphanage.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a shit? I wanna know how it got the car started!