Road jokes
Chuck Norris sent the chicken back across the road.
What’s big and black on the road?
Why did the chickens cross the road?
To get to KFC.
Why didn’t the cat cross the road?
Answer: Because it’s a scaredy-cat.
A guy walks into an AA meeting and asks for a road map.
Memes
Meanwhile in California…
Why did the toad cross the road?
To show his girlfriend he had guts.
Why did Bruce Jenner cross the road?
To see how the other side felt!
Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!
Why did the retard cross the road?
He never made it!
Why did the telemarketer cross the road?
I don't know.
I don't know either, but I hope there was a car coming.
What does an Asian say when his car tires burst on the highway?
"Some Ting Wheely Wong!"
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.
Why did the orphan cross the road?
To get to the real estate agent.
Americans: We drive on the right side of the road.
The British: We drive on the left side of the road.
Russia: ROAD IS ROAD. *crashing noises follow*
Yesterday I saw an orphan walking down the street. I asked him if he was ok. He said no, so I asked him if he needed help. And he said yes, so I let him in my car and said, "Don't worry, you'll be home with your parents soon." He said my parents died. I said I know.
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
So, I saw two homeless people on the road fighting. I said, "Stop fighting and go home." I guess it was a little insensitive.
Why did the skunk cross the road?
To get to the odor side!
Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz he felt like it mind your f***ing business like damn.