Road jokes
Q: Why can't Helen Keller drive?
A: Because she's a woman.
A black lady goes inside the drug store on Eight Mile Road in the city of Detroit, Michigan, and asks the pharmacist, "I would like to buy a box of tampons."
And then the black lady is asked by the pharmacist, "Do you want to buy the box of mini pads, or do you want to buy the box of maxi pads?"
And then the black lady asks the pharmacist, "What is the difference?"
And then the pharmacist asks the black lady, "What is your flow like?"
And then the black lady tells the pharmacist, "Linoleum."
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: Because chickens are mindless creatures and do not know any better.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to the bitch house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
lol so true
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
That doesn't matter, we need to get the best joker to go back to posting here, he was funny but now people say they are him and ruin his good name, he was the top of the charts for over a year, so screw all these chumps! Bring back THE REAL SPECIAL!!!
Also, the chicken dies in the end, ha ha, funny, whatever.
Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!
Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.
Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?
Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.
Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.
Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.
Brother 2: You monster.
Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?
Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.
Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.
Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!
Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.
Brother 1: Found them.
*imaginary mother and brother fade away*
Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.
Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.
What time is it when you get home? Can you walk me home, and then get home? Then I can walk you home, and walk home.
Why did the koala cross the road?
To get to the big tree.
Why did the rapper cross the road?
To drop some BARS on the other side.
What did the farmer say when he saw his chicken cross the road?
"No, my cock!"
The bird was trying to cross the road because there was a church, but instead, the birds chirp chirp chirp, "Let's go to church!"
Why did the one-eyed chicken cross the road?
To get to Birds Eye.
Why did the hobo cross the road?
To get the rotten donut on the other side.
Why did the egg cross the road?
'Cause he wanted to be scrambled!
Why did Stephen Hawking cross the road?
Oh wait, he didn't.
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over them.
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!
What’s a gay person’s favorite race track?
Rainbow Road.