Riddle jokes
What's the difference between a lightbulb and a pregnant woman?
You can unscrew a lightbulb.
What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese.
What do you call ten lesbians in a room together? Fingerhut.
What do you call two lesbians in a closet together? A liquor cabinet.
What do you call a room full of 50 lesbians and fifty congressmen? 100 people who don't do dick.
Why don't women wear miniskirts in the winter? 'Cause they would get chapped lips.
What do a cliff jumper and a gay man have in common? If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit.
The teacher asks me what my favourite word is.
I said it but got told off and sent to the principal.
What is my favourite word?
Why did the terrorist cross the road?
To get to the airport!
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7’s a cunt.
Akbar: How many crows are there, Birbal?
Birbal: 8,971.
Akbar: What if there are fewer?
Birbal: Then some crows went on vacation to visit their relatives.
Akbar: What if there are more?
Birbal: Then some came on vacation here to visit their relatives.
What’s black and white and red all over?
A Milano’s cherry.
Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.
Why is ten afraid? Because he’s in between nine and eleven.
Why was Balls afraid of Magic?
Because Magic eight Balls.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate 9.
But then why was 10 scared? Because it was in between 9 and 11.
What do you call two natives in a ditch?
A sleepover.
What's yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of children.
What do you call a pig in a blanket?
My wife on a cold day.
What has two wings and an arrow?
A Chinese telephone. "Wing Wing Arrow!"
Q. What do you get when you cross a mentally disabled person with a pedophile? A. Jeffy Epstein.
What do you call a person with nobody and no nose?
What’s black, white, and red all over? A nun on her period.
What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs in the evening?
A kitchen chair! Your momma sits in it for lunch, and your dad only manages to reattach one of the two legs that broke off by evening.
What do you call a guy with no body and nose?
No body nose
What falls from the tree first, the autistic retard or the apple?
The apple, because the rope caught the autistic retard.