The waiter comes and asks you for the check. Instead I give him a 20 dollar bill and say "Boy you Can Keep It"
Next time I'm at a restaurant, and they ask what I want to drink, I'm going to say bleach.
I would like to complain about the new sushi restaurant at Gatwick Airport. Although there were large portions going round on the conveyor, they did taste a bit like luggage.
What did the frog order? A diet croak!
Why did the chicken go to the restaurant? To eat chicken!
why cant orphans go to a family restaurants. because they don't have a family to go with
Why can't Tottenham open a restaurant? Because they have no silverware
#SpursAreIn9thLOL
Did you hear about the Italian chef who died? He pasta-way
just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time i eat at popeyes 😑
Sneed feed seed
Formerly chuck's!
What do you call two Mexicans at a country restaurant? "Two beaners in a cracker house."
First Date: HE:"i work with animals every day!" SHE:"oh how sweet! what is it that you do?" HE:"I'm a butcher" SHE:"were through!"
why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant? because he had a big bill
An Autistic Chef made Hamburgers out of Donkey meat.
He called them: "ASPERGER'S"
What's a cannibals favorite place? A day care
I saw a beautiful homeless girl and asked if I could take her out on a date. She politely accepted and enjoyed herself. Soon after I asked if I could take her home, she smiled and nodded her head. Her smile disappeared when she saw me running away with her cardboard box.
an indian kid walked into the shop and had a curry down becuase they had no nann bread in stock
When a person went to a restaurant they died once they were in 3 people were a suspect 2was suspected cause she served the food”turns out it was the food
The next time you get a sack call pick up the phone and say “welcome to Pete’s pizzeria and abortion clinic your loss is next weeks sauce how may we help you
*I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast any time" so I ordered French toast during the Renaissance.― Steven Wright
