When fat people sit down at a restaurant, and you listen closely, you can hear the chair screaming.
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Because KFC was offering free seeds.
In honor of Diddy:
The ice cream machine at McDonald's now works!
What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?
Fast food.
What do you call it when you choose Panera Bread over something else?
Panera instead.
What do you call it when Panera bread commits genocide Panera bloodshed
McDonald's worker be like hello would you like a mc-dick(you looked down)you:uhh wheres my dick?
What do KFC and pussy have in common?
Both are finger lickin' good, and after you are done eating, you have a box to put the bone in.
I arrived at a restaurant early and manager said do you mind waiting a bit? I said I don’t mind and he said OK. Take these trays to table 9.
I was sitting on my own in a restaurant when I saw a beautiful woman at another table. I sent her a bottle of the most expensive wine on the menu. She sent me a note, “I will not touch a drop of this wine unless you can assure me that you have seven inches in your pocket.” I wrote back, “Give me the wine. As gorgeous as you are, I'm not cutting off three inches for anyone.”
Why did the rapper go to the seafood restaurant?
Because he heard they had PHAT BASS
Rapboat sez he has a rap career. Wrap career more like, wrapping burgers at mcdonalds
Why did the rapper become a chef?
Because he wanted to drop some HOT MIXTAPES
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
Person 1: “How many ph vids have you watched today?”
Person 2: “Seven.”
Person 1: “What the fuck, dude.”
Person 2: “I know, right? I’ve gotten seven ads for Pizza Hut in the past hour.”
(Based on an encounter I had recently)
What do you call a rapper's favorite place to eat?
The MIC Donald’s drive-thru
Dear Victims... äh Passengers, we are flying now from Ryadh to New York. Amazing Building... äh Amazing City. There's online, but 2000 there were two Towers... äh Restaurants. We hijack the plane... äh Hi Jack. Jack is my co-pilot, and I said hello. Don‘t scream... History Repea... äh... History never comes back, we are now flying back to the Airport. 💀
I’m going to open my own Mexican restaurant and call it boarder patrol.
I went to a restaurant and a waiter took my order. She had two black eyes, so I ordered real slow.
Because obviously she doesn’t listen.
