I like...
Wendy's.
"Wendeez nuts in your mouth."
Your forehead goes back to when Burger King was Burger Prince.
Why do dwarfs hate fast food restaurants? Cause most of them have medium and large.
Why did the orphan not get service at the restaurant?
Because it was a family restaurant!
I was at the bar late last night when a waitress screamed, "Anyone know CPR?" I said, "Shit, I know all the letters of the alphabet." Everyone laughed, well, except for this one guy.
Hello, This is Jimmy from Jimmy's Pizzeria and Abortion Clinic! Your next loss is our next sauce! How many pizzas do you need?
A guy walks into a restaurant and orders turtle soup. The waiter hollers, "One turtle soup!"
A moment later, the guy calls the waiter over and says, "I’ve changed my mind, I would like pea soup." The waiter hollers, "Hold the turtle, and make it pea!"
How did the chicken 🐔 feel after escaping the fry cook?
Clucky!
You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."
Why can't emos work at a restaurant? Because they cut too much.
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
What kind of fish do people eat?
Deep-fried fish.
What does a waiter in a Chinese restaurant call a customer that won't leave a tip? A "plick."
Why can the orphan only go to restaurants?
Because they can't have homemade meals.
A pancake and an egg walk into a bar. The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve breakfast.”
A peanut and another peanut walk into a bar.
One was a salted peanut.
Did you hear about the new emo pizza? It cuts itself.
Why did the chicken cross the road to Popeyes Chicken?
It wanted to pop some chicken eyes...
Yo mama's so fat, she thinks the buffet is the starter plate.
I was drinking a martini when a waitress yelled, "Do you know CPR?"
I replied, "I know the entire alphabet!" We all laughed and laughed, well, except one person.
