Restaurant jokes

Why can't orphans eat at a family restaurant?

Because there is no family.

Bunger.

Welcome to the Fast Food Divorce Center where yesterday's lies are today's fries.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because KFC was offering free seeds.

I’m going to open my own Mexican restaurant and call it boarder patrol.

What does a cannibal call a wheelchair user?

Fast food.

If you want KFC, pour water on a poor person outside our restaurant and film it.

Ur mum so fat that when she walked into a bar, they said, "Sorry, we don't sell food here."

What do you call a boy Panera Bread?

Panera Balls.

This bunny named Mason came up to a bar and ordered a beer and a burger. He sits at a table and the waiter brought a huge burger.

Mason: "Heh. Good thing I eat like a horse." He looks up at the waiter.

Waiter: "You are a nasty little bunny, aren't you?"

Mason screamed and ran away as the waiter chased him... she was a HORSE.

So I was at a restaurant and I really hit it off with the waitress, so one thing led to another and I'm at her place and she was really nice at the IHOP but when I was there with her she was all like "ahhh! what are you doing!?!?!? how did you get in my house?!?!?" and then she punched me and I'm the one who ended up in prison.

Why did the octopus cross the road?

'Cause he was on the same side as a sushi restaurant.

What does a Catholic Priest and a commercial from the 80s have in common? They both ask people, "Where's the meat?"

Why do lions 🦁 go to SUBWAY 🥪?

Because they like to EAT FLESH.

Where did the cow go on his first date? To the moovies.

What do you call a bunch of Mexicans running down a hill?

Taco Bell going out of business.

Recently I visited a restaurant in Crotone. When I was done eating, I told the waitress I was “Penaldo” with my food. She instantly knew that I was finished with my food.

The Twin Towers ordered a pepperoni pizza, but it came plain.

So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"

So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."

You are so fat that the waiter said to you every time: "Sorry for your weight" instead of "Sorry for the wait."