Remembering Jokes

Hang in there, ya emo bastards! Remember, you could always be dead. Oh, too soon?

No wonder they wanna die so much. I'd wanna die too if I was a freak who listens to Black Veil Brides!

Anybody got a knife? I mean, an emo dildo?

I was about to go to sleep, but then I remembered my idol has 0 G/A, and it's mid-November. Thanks, Pessi, for ruining my sleep! 🤬

Who remembers when ‘tweeting’ meant “stabbing a hooker”?

Papyrus: I hate you, Frisk.

Frisk: This is why Mettaton doesn't fucking love you.

Sans: Kid, I will kill you.

Papyrus: (Remembers something) That's why you don't have a lover, you lonely giraffe!

A person went to tell a joke: "Knock knock!" "Who’s there?" "I don’t remember!" (I think we need to moove on to the next joke now.)

I just now made this one up! Then I realized it is in the cow category, so I added the moove on part! 😂

me now & go look at one of my first posts on here

A person with a red hoodie and glasses looks displeased. Behind, there are two posters. The one on the left has 'GOAL FOR MATH CLASS' written on top followed by a list with goals for a math class and the one on the right contains a diagram of the x-axis and y-axis with examples.

A computer usually has a HARD drive. LESSON. No wonder they remember things.

I remember locking my door, but then I went downstairs to hear someone say, "I'm inside your home." I said, "GTFO my house, BICH!"

I still remember my dad's last words, "You c***! You let the ladder go, you cuuunt!"

Smack! He hit the ground and bled out.

I remember you. You used to be an ash.

I would love to roast you more, but my mom said to not burn trash.

England: No towers?

America: No queen?

England: Remember 1812?

America: No tea?

Teacher: Here, have candy.

Kid: No, I’m too fat.

Teacher: Shut up, or I’m gonna fail you.

*Next week*

Teacher: Okay kids, get off the floor and go back to your seats.

Kid: I’m too fat to get up.

Teacher: Don’t you remember what I said?

Kid: Yep, elephants don’t forget.

I will remember my brother's last words: if you can't put a fork in a toaster, how about a spoon?

My dad died when we couldn’t remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to “be positive,” but it’s hard without him.

It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.

It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.

I remember my grandma's last words:

"What are you doing with that axe?"

When someone falls, you say to them, "I remember when I started to learn to walk."

The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one.