Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand. Moments after I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.
I love to decorate my room because it's a great way to express your heart, though I just remembered, my room is pretty black and empty...
-Heather-By-Conan Gray and watersharky-Remix- I still remember the third of December, me in your sweater You said it looked better on me than it did you Only if you knew how much I liked you But I watch your eyes as she Walks by What a sight for sore eyes Brighter than the blue sky She's got you mesmerised while I die Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester But you like her better Wish I were Heather Watch as she stands with her, holding your hand Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder But how could I hate her, she's such an angel But then again, kinda wish she were dead as she Walks by What a sight for sore eyes Brighter than the blue sky She's got you mesmerised while I die Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester But you like her better I wish I were Heather Oh, I wish I were Heather Oh, oh, wish I were Heather Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half as pretty You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester But you like her better Wish I were-
lol I keep stealing my dad's medication money and the best part is he never remembers.
I’ll never forget the first time we met. But I’ll keep trying.
seems very long. you wont remember the tel number..... I remember it lile this from school days in Ireland.
Dolly Patron is shopping for new bra , lady says your size (69) , Dolly says no way that too too too (222) big, so she goes to doctor , Doc I need something to make my boobs smaller , here take (51) pills for 6 days ( x6) and soo she did . days later she ran back to doc, jesus Christ doctor look what happened Im BOOBLESS. 55378008 upside down.
I'll remember my last words...."SORRY IM NOT SORRY"
I told me Mum will u remember me in 6 mins 6 hours 6 years she said ye nock nock I said my mum who’s there u didn’t remember me
This joke includes potentially sensitive content.
You got no lotion to musterbate,,,..then you remember there's some left over porridge in the fridge 😌🤎😇
Anybody remember 9/11? Cause I sure do, and oh boy was my father a good pilot.💥
i will remember my aunties last word: if you shoot me you pen-s is small (gun shot)
tell an orphan ur mom but then remember he doesn't have one
You have a problem with jokes about dementia? Thats funny, I don't remember asking.
I can’t remember if I already said this or not I might of already said this also this is a true story. So I’m walking into a store in Amish country and there’s this guy with a bear trap then my moms friend says this guys gonna catch some bears then the Amish guy stop looks around and whispers “it’s for democrats”
I can't remember the last full conversation I had with my grandfather. Good thing is, since he hit his head he can't remember either.
You think THAT'S bad?!? Remember the time I was in Paris with Donny de Francovich?
Pinned Comment: Reminder: Check the fridge, but remember nothings in there.
I've been looking for my parents for years.for the life of me I can't remember where I hid their bodies
So, I remember growing my own peanuts really well, there's one that's larger than the others. I can't keep my eye off of it.
I'm scared that it moves at night.
I'm being serious. I literally can't keep my off it.
