Religion jokes
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and acne?
Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
Why did the priest buy a clown suit?
Because the old one had blood all over it.
An American walks into an Afghan bar. Joke, Afghanistan doesn't have bars because of the Taliban.
How many heterosexual men does it take to change a lightbulb in heaven?
Both of them.
What did God say to the black person?
"Oops, I burned one."😳
Not racist, just funny.
A true God would be godless himself.
How do you kill a Hindu? PRESS THE RED BUTTON.
Why do orphans want to die?
Because they might see their parents in Heaven.
Yo hairline so far back, it goes back to Jesus on the cross!
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
A child molester and a priest walk into a bar. He orders a drink.
Why is Biden a priest?
So kids call him father.
What is the true meaning of Christmas?
Stealing presents from orphans - a quote by Technoblade.
In the movie "Cars 2", there is a priest, which means car Jesus died for the sins of the cars.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.
A 17 year old pregnant Juanita flew all the way to NY from TX to get an abortion. Initially, she was denied the procedure because she wasn't COVID boosted, but after she explained the father was religious and wanted to be involved, they quickly resolved the threat.
Why did the orphan go to church?
To finally call someone father. 😂😂
I was making holy water, and my girlfriend walked in, saying, "What are you doing?"
I said, "Making holy water."
She said, "How are you making holy water?"
I'm boiling the hell out of it.
And the children of Israel wandered round the desert for 40 years, until eventually Moses' wife said, "Are you going to ask for directions, or what?"
What did the priest say to the Muslim? Wazza!