Religion jokes
Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized at SeaWorld!
All you pro-life Christian motherfuckers can go die, lol.
Ganesha is an elephant.
I’m rather relaxed about death.
From quite an early age, I’ve regarded it as part of the deal, the unwritten guarantee that comes with your birth certificate.
If we can't say "God" in vain, why does He get to?
Yo mama so fat, she had to get baptized in the ocean.
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
A priest walked in and said to the kids,
"Hey kids, are you ready for your faptism?"
When God had to take a shit from making a good wife, you pasted between his ass cheeks...
Q: What do Satan and a priest have in common?
A: They both want Anthony's neck.
There are "nun" good jokes.
Your hairline is so far back it was back on before Jesus Christ was born.
Why do orphans go to church?
Because there they have a father.
A nun going down a water shoot? She never felt so wet in all her life!
I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.
Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔
Why did Jesus come back from the dead? He forgot to tell you that you're gay!
I am starting a frog cult now!
Me: Hey God, are you there? It's me, Michael.
God: *SILENCE*
Me: If any gods exist, they better say or do something this instant!
God: *SILENCE*
The Christian, the Buddhist, and the Muslim each go on a separate plane.
The Christian's and the Buddhist's flight goes well, but the Muslim's plane has a problem and crashes into two towers.
My dad died in 9/11. I'll always remember his last words:
Allah hu akbar.