Relationship jokes
You can tell a lot about a woman from her ankles. If they are on your shoulders, she probably likes you.
Raju: How about you, Sunil?
Do you know?
Sanju: Sunil is my long distance
is a brother.
Raju: Long brother?
Sanju: Yes, because I live in Ratnagiri and he lives in Nagpur.
Why is it better to date an orphan?
Their parents are never home.
Swiggity swooty, I'm coming for that booty!
One day I visited my friend in a hospital.
I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"
Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.
Why are life and a penis alike?
Women make both of them hard.
What is the difference between a gay male who is not physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male that is not physically challenged, and a gay male who is physically challenged giving a blowjob to a gay male who is not physically challenged?
A gay male who is not physically challenged who receives a blowjob from a gay male who is physically challenged would still not believe that the physically challenged male is gay because the gay male who is not physically challenged is the definition of an asshole.
Mommy, mommy! Are we bank robbers?
Shut up and pass me the note.
Who did yo mama marry?
Joe Mama.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They are both meat substitutes.
My wife and I went to the bar to get a drink, but 2 mins later, I see her dead on the ground. I guess she couldn't see the bottle flying at her face. Then I laughed and went home.
Why don't orphans get dad jokes?
Because they don't have a dad to tell them.
My girl got mad at me last night for saying to my mom that she had a dildo ready at all times and is always hard, so my mom wanted to see. So I whipped out my penis and my mom said it’s bigger than your dad’s!
Why can't orphans be gay?
'Cause they have no one to call "daddy."
Pickup line: Are you the internet? 'Cause I feel a connection.
I went home one day. My mom said, "Look what a few guys got me." It was a MILF trophy.
My mom asked what does that mean. So I said, "Mom's I'd Like To Fuck." Then my mom said, "These guys want to fuck me?" I said, "Yeah." Then my mom said, "I still got it!"
I have a secret crush on your momma.
I like my lovers like I like my whiskey, 12 years old and mixed up with coke.
There are two sexes: one with your mother and the other with you.