Relationship jokes
What did the toaster say to the bread?
"I want you inside me!"
Why are there only 362 days in an orphan's calendar? They don’t have Father's Day, Mother's Day, or Family Day.
Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"
"Hey, is that a peach?"
*gets slapped on the butt*
"Noted."
When your wife takes 30 minutes to get ready.
Me: Takes five minutes.
Me: Hun, you done yet?
It’s funny my sister wanted to have sex with me.
What's long, hard, and full of semen?
Answer: Me.
"Uwu daddy."
I took my girlfriend to the beach and a marine biologist thought she was a beluga whale!
Can someone be my daddy?
Why did the orphan cry to the teacher? Because they have no one else.
Guys, this is so disrespectful, I love Jesus. I go to church every Tuesday morning to give Jesus a... giffffffft.
So disrespectful guys. #jesusismyhubby
Why did 6 hate 7?
Because 7 ate 9!
Why is the divorce rate among socks so high?
What do my cock and money have in common?
Your mom.
"Can we do 69?"
"How about we do 9/11 since we will crash together?"
Yo mamma sucks!
Fall coming 🍁 grab you a hoodie & sum1's thick thigh baby mama to keep you warm 😌🍂
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have someone to call daddy.