Relationship jokes
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Albert is a homophobic guy. His cousin Franco is also a homophobic guy.
Albert's aunt and cousin have visited his parents, but Albert didn't know that because he came late at night. Franco was sleeping in Albert's bed, thinking he would not come home. Albert laid on his bed, thinking there was no one on it, and then they started fucking ^_*
No phobia lasts forever 👌😂
In 69, the 6 looks like someone facing up. The 9 looks like someone facing down.
69 looks like 2 people suck each other’s dick. That means, L7.
Why were you born?
Because I asked out your mom on accident.
"What does the word 'gay' mean?" asked a son of his father.
"It means 'happy'," replied the father.
"Oh," contested the son, "so you are gay then?"
"No, son, I have a wife."
Men (I LOVE DICK) FUCK YOU BY THE WAY
As a son, I like sports, and I watch sports with my mom. So one day, we were looking at football. My mom asked me who makes the most money. I said the quarterback.
My mom told me I'm going to get a quarterback as my new boyfriend, and it'll be your new stepfather. A week later, my mom went out. I came home, and I see my mom making out with a high school kid. I said, "What's going on?" My mom said, "Look, my new boyfriend and new stepfather is the high school quarterback." My mom said, "See, mission accomplished." I said, "Yeah, job well done."
Why do my parents not love me? Because I've fucked 12 dogs and 7 minors while they were watching!
What do you call an emo dating another emo?
The suicide duo.
I went to a stand up show with the person who made my life a joke.
Why do any orphans have sex?
Because they can't call anyone "daddy."
You'll never be lonely at cousinsonly.com.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call "daddy."
Q: How do you know a wishing well works?
A: If your mother-in-law falls down it.
Mom: You will make me kill myself.
Me who has cut first: I'll kill myself ✨first✨!
(Me) Hey bro, tell me a joke!
(My friend) Your mom. *Starts Laughing*
(Me) *Fakes laughs* *then points a gun at him*
At this moment, he knew he fucked up.
Why is reverse cowgirl banned in Alabama? Because you never turn your back on family.
What's the difference between a nuclear reactor and your step sis? You need to use protection for the nuclear reactor.
What did one cheese say to the other cheese?
"Hello, it's a nice day, do you have any plans on what you're going to do?"... The other cheese was taken back by his politeness and friendliness, they agreed to meet again, and were soon married and lived happily ever after. Let this tale of the two cheeses inspire you to be a better person.
How did the Emo kid bag all the cheerleaders?
He hit them all when he started shooting his shot.