Relationship jokes
I told my wife she was lousy in bed.
She replied, "I guess you have been seeing your ex-girlfriend, uh?"
Are you a waterfall?
'Cause I'm falling for you.
If 6 guys are in a room with each other, is it technically a 6-pack?
Want to have sex?
Orphans can be gay, no problem, because they have no one to disown them.
Doctor: “You’ll be at peace soon.”
Man: “Am I dying?”
Doctor: “No, your wife is.”
If your wife says: “What would you most like to do to my body?” “Identify it” is the wrong answer.
I went on a date with an Eastern European chick. She got mad because I rushed her...
Get it? It's Russia, and I rushed her.
My newly wed wife is a porn star. She would probably kill me if she found out.
The highest praise my wife gave to me was when she told me, "The best feminine attribute on your body as a woman would be your p🍆nis." 🥰
They say the polar ice caps are melting, good, because my wife's a fat, cold bitch.
Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.
I went fishing while watching porn, and my girlfriend said, "Well, you want my fish?" and I said, "But you're not in the water."
Your so fat, my sister said. I said, "So at least I ain't fatter than your momma."
A: Guess what kind of men/women do gold diggers like?
Q: One that has a sense of money.
Why does an orphan cry when we say "ur mom?"
Because they have no mom.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
Friend: Wanna hear a joke?
Orphan Friend: Sure.
Friend: Parents.
Other: I don't get it.
Friend: And you never will.
What do frogs wear for shoes? Open toad.
What does your mom say to you? "Love you, moody."
You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.