Relationship jokes
Girls are like bacteria. The toxic ones are everywhere, and you have to take special care of the good ones.
This bitch won't message me anymore, what the fuck do I do? Why are bitches so sensitive?
Why can't I get a girlfriend?
Because I'm a beta male simp.
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
Boyfriend: "Babe, are you traffic police?"
Girlfriend: "No."
Boyfriend: "Then why do you shout at me for not wearing a helmet?"
Memes
ky you def like her
When you tell your mom that she is bad at jokes, then she tells you, "Well, I made you!"
What does an orphan call a family photo?
A selfie.
Want a kiss, daddy? Want a blow job?
Are there support groups for men?
Son: Dad, if I told you I was gay, would you still love me?
Dad: Don’t be silly son, you were an accident. I never loved you in the first place.
Are you feeling down? Because I wanna feel you up.
Who needs Singles Day when you're single for the rest of your life!
Some guy asked me, "Are you better than my meat?" I said, "No, I'm not better, I just beat it all the time."
What does an orphan call a family picture?
"A selfie."
Women are like blackjack. I’m trying for 21, but I always hit on 9.
I don't need a girlfriend, 'cause I got my cousin, bro.
When an orphan takes a family photo, it’s called a selfie.
Me: I need a good roast.
My friend: Take me!
My girlfriend’s dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one. But, unfortunately, it just made her more upset.
She screamed at me, “What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?”
Children and your meat are actually quite similar.
At first you seem weirded out by spanking it, but later on you start to enjoy it.