Relationship

Relationship jokes

Daddy, I really miss you. Mummy changed my name to Tickle Timpson. Anyway, daddy I forgive you for abusing me.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your grandma died, your dad left you too, Now you're living with your old grandma coot. Oh, let's not forget your mom left you, too. You gon' live alone, die alone, with no roses on your casket, too.

How do you surprise a 50-year-old man? By putting a 12-inch dick through his ass.

He said, "Best surprise ever!"

My grandma told me I was next at my brother's wedding, so I told her she was next at her husband's funeral.

What do orphans and broken up couples have in common?

They can't see each other anymore.

Friend: I broke up with Sara.

Me: I know, she came over and I screwed her hard.

Friend: How did her pussy feel?

Me: After about 2 inches, it felt brand new.

Friend: What do you— HOLD UP. WHAT TF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN!?!

Why did your mom cross the road?

You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.

I'm going to destroy your momma's [vulgar term] just like I destroyed that Tastykake.

I think my dad loves jokes.

Because he laughs when he looks at me.