If a woman says she needs to set boundaries between you and her, you would be crossing it if you are a Mexican.
That one depressed friend.
Neither of them respect boundaries.
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
I saw a pretty girl walking outside. I asked for her number.
We met up and began to have sex. She told me to turn over, which was weird. I felt a stinging pain in my ass all of a sudden.
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
Why do orphans miss Motherβs Day? Because they donβt have a mother to give to!
Sister, you're ugly.
Other sister: I'm not your reflection.
PS. Sorry if it is not funny.
When you realize your friend standing next to you is adopted and narrates everything he does.
"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "You're." "You're who?" "You're parents left you."
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the π love of your life!π
And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!
Comment those numbers to lock it in!!π
One time I was with my uncle. He said to me to pass him the marble on the floor. All I heard was my butt clapping with his sausage.
Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.
Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.
Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.
But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.
Whatβs a 5 letter word that starts with a βPβ that girls love to get their hands on? π
A rich man and a poor man are talking about anniversaries. The rich man got his wife a Mercedes and a diamond ring. He says if the wife does not like the ring, she can take the Mercedes and leave.
The poor man said he got his wife slippers and a dildo. He says if his wife does not like the slippers, she can go and fuck herself.
Why do you call a priest a father? Because calling them daddy would be too sus.
You smash me so hard, I gave her the D.
We all know yo homie bout to hop in a fight when:
1. He staring mighty hard at y'all.
2. When your friend know you gon get your ass beat.
3. When your friend say he not gon jump in (you know he lying).
I went to visit my childhood home. I asked the owners if I could come in for some nostalgic memories. They said no and slammed the door on me. My parents are so mean.
Yo momma so fat that it was hard to find the G spot and slip her one at night.
