Jack: Hey Josh!
Josh: What?
Jack: Sex!
Josh: Huh?
Jack: SEX!!
Josh: I don't get it.
Jack: Exactly ;)
Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
His wife died.
When you're fucking your boss's daughter, then you realize that you are self-employed.
My ex-wife still misses me, but her aim is getting better!
Shaenaya is single, 16, and looking for a 30 year old man that can pleasure her, huh?
SHAENAYA WANTS TO SUCK EVERYBOYS DICK BESIDES MINE CAUSE SHE A THIRSTY HOE.
Shaenaya hates me, help! And she wants to suck off ******* and ****** and ***** and *****.
I have an auntie who has no arms and no legs. She is my dad's half sister.
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Slap it on the arse and tell it to keep going!
I like my coffee like my men, long and black.
What can you tell a dog, but not your girlfriend? Come.
I like my women like I like my coffee.
Dark, rich, and imported.
Guy: Say "I'm a man" every time I stop.
Person:
Guy: You walk into a bar.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You meet a girl.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You and the girl go to a hotel.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: You guys go on a bed.
Person: I'm a man.
Guy: She whispers into your ear...
Person: I'm a man!
My father is like Houdini. When he heard his girlfriend was pregnant, he disappeared.
What does a husband of a woman do when he is horny?
He goes on a business trip with 100 $1 dollar bills.
I like my woman like I like my coffee: in a big sack on top of a donkey.
Stage 4 cancer is like a woman. You can’t beat it, but if you do, she’ll probably come back again.
Q: How do you know a wishing well works?
A: If your mother-in-law falls down it.
Friend: My girls are like boomerangs; they always come back.
Me: Mine DON'T :(
Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.
Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(
