Relationship jokes
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it had its ion someone else.
My sister's boyfriend is mad at me because I fucked his girl.
I fucked your girl.
Three boy chihuahua were hot about this girl chihuahua. She tells them, "I will date whichever one of you can use liver and cheese in the same sentence."
First dog says, "I love cheese, but liver is bland."
She replies, "Really original."
Next dog, "I love liver, but cheese makes me constipated."
She replies, "Ew, gross."
Third dog steps up, "Man, liver alone cheese mine."
Winner dog 3.
I like my dynamite like I like my woman: hot and ready to explode.
Roses are red, your penis is blue, the bed sheet has turned a different color, too.
When my friend says I suck at something, I'm like, "U swallow."
After sleeping with her boyfriend for the first time, the lead singer of Blackbriar told her friend all about it: "Ik zora cock!"
I'm still playing hide & seek with my dad.
What's the difference between my dad and a hooker?
Hookers come back.
I like my women like I like my coffee.
Without other people's dicks in it.
Your mom's my dad. Think about that!
Why are mountains so cold?? Your mom lol.
Me: Hey, wanna know my spirit animal?
Friend: Sure.
Me: Roadkill, because I can see my mom pretty clearly now.
Friend: Wait, aren't you dead?
Me: Aren't you my son?
Friend: So that's what Mom was trying to hide from me.
A girl and a boy were on a date. The boy kept farting. The girl asked, "What is wrong?!?". The boy replied, "Explosive diarrhea.". The girl said, "Ew".
The boy went to the bathroom, and the place exploded. The center of the explosion, the bathroom.
One day I saw my friend in a hospital bed. He told me to call 911. Instead, I called his parents.
Guess how I'm getting laid tonight?
"I'm stronger than you."
This guy walked into a pizzeria and ordered a water. The owner called him an idiot.
His girlfriend walked in and ordered a pineapple pizza.
The guy left her, and the owner made her leave.
I love your mom and dad's joke! They made it together and called it your name.
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!