Relationship jokes

Would I be considered a "homo" because I have sex at home?

Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could suck Jill’s candy.

Jack got a shock because Jill’s real name was Randy.

Hey Gwen, reply to me and say if everything is alright.

Once Jimmy was minding his own business, then he hears his mom come home. He asked, "Where have you been?" She replied with, "I was at work," yet he knew his mom did not have work. So the next day, while heading to school, he gets a phone call saying his mom is pregnant, and they want to try their device, and they need the baby's dad to say if it's alright.

Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.

Jack got high, grabbed Jill's thigh, and said, "I know you wanna."

Jill said yes, lifted up her dress, and then they had some fun, but silly Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.

Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. 🙂

My sister's friends are hilarious, like seriously, haha.

I saw an orphan fall in the street crying, so I ran up to him and said, "Are you okay? Where are your parents?"

Hey selfish king, I see you need a girlfriend ;)

I fucked your mum last night, that she was salty.

What's the difference between my mum and my dad?

My mum stayed.

Can you be my daddy? 🍌😘😉

My sister says I’m annoying, or that’s what I read in her diary.

Gwen, I thought you would be with me if Prince broke up with you... :((((((

I took my mother-in-law out today...

I love being a sniper.

My girlfriend got ran over by a bus. I lost my job as a bus driver.

I am sooooooo bored, Gwen, can you please get on, or anybody, since I'm weirdly obsessed with Gwen.

Why did LazarBeam kiss a man?

Because he couldn't kiss Fresh; he was already gay.

Me and my wife were out at dinner. Me being 48 and her being 19, people were screaming at us and calling me a creep. It really ruined our 10th anniversary.

Hi, I'm new here and I'm 11. I'm just bored and want a girlfriend.

Does anyone have Snapchat or Twitter? I can show you what I look like ;)