Red jokes
In America, there was a boy named Urhan, and he had one hand and a stump, and a girl named Handa who was an orphan. They had a trial for the Boston Red Sox, and they failed because Urhan couldn’t stump the ball, and Handa didn’t know where home was.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
What's green then red all over and goes 100mph?
A frog in a blender.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The third one's for you.
What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red Ferrari?
I don't have the Ferrari.
Roses are red, Violets are twisted, Come back to my place, You might get fisted.
Roses are red, give me some limes, boy dies after masturbating 42 times.
Roses are red, Violets are blue... I fucked your mother's ass, and she had you.
What do you call a redneck on fire?
A fire cracker.
What does it take to paint a wall red?
Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.
What's black and red and goes 90 miles an hour? A baby in a blender!
Roses are red, I don't know why, Living is hard, I want to die.
I like my girls like I like my wine.
12 years old and locked in my basement.
Why did two red heads fall off the plane? Because they were so damn blind.
Boy: Mom, why are you drinking this disgusting red soup? I wanted salad.
Mom: Quiet, son. We only get this once a month.
What turns green to red in a flick of a switch?
A frog in a blender.
What is 6" long, bright red, and your wife cries when you feed it to her?
Her miscarriage.