Red jokes
what did the pedophile say to the kid?
"Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van."
What’s red and cries?
A skinned baby in a bag of salt.
How do you blow up an Indian person?
You press the red button.
Roses are red, your mother has said, "Come back again, and you'll be dead!"
A boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned.
What turns red, blue then white? The last person that I'd strangle.
In America, there was a boy named Urhan, and he had one hand and a stump, and a girl named Handa who was an orphan. They had a trial for the Boston Red Sox, and they failed because Urhan couldn’t stump the ball, and Handa didn’t know where home was.
What is red, green, lies in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs?
...A girl scout that got hit by a car.
Roses are red, Kevin Spacey is gay,
If you'd stayed with your parents, I wouldn't have taken you away.
Roses are red, I failed my test, All because of Hugh and his incest.
What's green then red all over and goes 100mph?
A frog in a blender.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, A face like yours belongs in the zoo, But don't you worry, I'll be there too, Not in a cage, but laughing at you!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The third one's for you.
What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red Ferrari?
I don't have the Ferrari.
Roses are red, Violets are twisted, Come back to my place, You might get fisted.
Roses are red, give me some limes, boy dies after masturbating 42 times.
Roses are red, Violets are blue... I fucked your mother's ass, and she had you.
What do you call a redneck on fire?
A fire cracker.
What does it take to paint a wall red?
Kurt Cobain and his shotgun.
What's black and red and goes 90 miles an hour? A baby in a blender!