Recreation jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They have no home to run to.
Cool, new word of the day: Marijuana.
“Does Marry wanna smoke a joint?”
I miss playing baseball.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy as a kid?
Hot Wheels.
What do orphans, parents, and a ball have in common?
If you throw them, they both will never come back.
Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”
Mom: “That would be fine, but he hasn’t come out of his room since Friday.”
Boys: “Have you checked the closet?”
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving, you need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
I did not want to join sailing, but my friend roped me into it.
I wondered why the pitcher hadn’t pitched the ball yet.
Then it hit me.
This is an a-maze-ing joke!
You know the difference between happy tailgaters and angry tailgaters?
Happy tailgaters know how to throw a party.
What is the best day to go to the beach?
On Sunday.
Why did the chef cook his eggs on the golf course? Because he wanted them par-boiled!
Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.
After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”
The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”
Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”
If your parachute doesn't work, don't worry.
You have the rest of your life to figure it out.
Why do orphans suck at baseball? Because they never could play catch.
When Bob got on that sled, I don't know how he went so smoothly, but that is the invention of bobsled peoples.
And then Mark came in.
Q: What is a box's favorite sport?
A: Box-ketball.
What is a fun game for an emo kid?
Tug-o-war with a tree.
I got hit in the balls by a tennis ball.