Recreation jokes
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
What do you call a man with no arms or legs being pulled by a boat?
Skip.
Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!
Q: What do American beer and canoes have in common?
A: Fu@king close to water!
Jack and Jill went up the hill to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high and slapped his thigh and said, "You know you wanna."
Jill said yes, picked up her dress and said, "Let's have some fun!"
Silly ole Jill forgot her pill, and now they have a son.
When you go to the community pool
Why can’t orphans play baseball??
Because they can’t find their way to home plate.
What is an emo's most hated game? Hangman.
Because it's rubbing it in their face that they can't hang themselves.
Why did the rapper go to the beach?
To drop some FLOW-TIDE!
Why did the chef cook his eggs on the golf course? Because he wanted them par-boiled!
"Ryan, come out to play-ee-ay!!"
I love games.
Why did the orphan stop playing baseball?
Because baseball has a home, and an orphan does not.
Laugh now.
Climb high, climb far,
Get high, get far.
I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.
I call it my trail mix.
Why did the bike fall over?
It was too tired.
Why can't you run through a campground?
Because it's "past tents!"
If you jump off a building and yell "parkour," how can they tell that it was intentional? T'was a failed stunt.
Two kids are out in the cold, with downpours of snow erupting from the clouds.
One of the kids says something: "Can we build a snowman that is going through puberty?"
The other kid says something else: "Yes. It sounds cool."
After a while, the snowman was finished, and some words jut out of the first kid's mouth: "Wow! Look at that snowman! It's got hair all over, but I think it's missing something though."
The other kid jumps a little and begins speaking: "Oh, I know what it is!"
After a while, a body part made of a carrot and two cucumbers appears on the snowman's crotch. It is a penis and a ballsack.
The first kid speaks: "Icy what you did there."
The other kid replies: "Good thing I didn't slip up there."
The first kid replies: "Well, that's snow problem."
The other kid then uttered this: "These puns would make the most frigid individual crack up."
The first kid then says: "I know, right?"
They then begin a snowball fight.
The other kid then says: "Only the men have snowballs!"
Did you hear about the midget who was beaten to death playing volleyball at a nudist colony?
I can’t take my dog to the park anymore.
Why?
The ducks keep trying to eat him.
Why would they do that?
Because he’s pure-bread.